Wednesday, July 27, 2016

The First Three Steps in Saving Your Marriage

 “We loved with a love that was more than love.”  Edgar Allan Poe

They say falling in love is the easy part. It's staying in love that's hard. Indeed, it takes work to make a relationship last. Yet, there will come a time when no matter how sure you are that your partner is still special to you, doubts and insecurities will plague your relationship. Painful as it is to admit, some relationships really do have to end. Is yours one of them? Or can it still be saved?
If you value your partner too much to give up on the relationship easily, read on to find out how you can help erase thoughts of ever leaving it.
1.Determine if your relationship is worth saving.
Before you even make attempts at rescuing your relationship, ask yourself first if it's really worth saving. Yes may be your fervent answer, but is it an honest one? Think of the long-term consequences and think hard. If you will stay in this marriage, what will it cost you? If you leave, how do you think your decision will affect you emotionally, mentally, physically, spiritually, and financially? Moreover, look back on better times. Were you, for the most part in your relationship, happy and contented? Do you think you still have a chance of regaining that feeling of completeness? Do you desire, with all your heart, to relive those wonderful moments when you were still madly and completely in love? Do you believe your love, or what's left of it, is worth saving?
2.Give the relationship your 100%.
If you do decide that you will do whatever it is needed to save your relationship, then you have to commit to that resolve a hundred percent. There should be no doubt in your mind that your love deserves a second chance. Change what needs to be changed. Understand, though, that as much as you want to, you cannot change another person. You can only influence them, so once you have made up your mind that you want your marriage to last, give it 100% focus and energy. Do not wait for your partner to make the first move. Show them what you want and if they want the same thing, they will also start to commit to the relationship 100%.
3. Maintain positive attitude all the way.
Take your relationship seriously but don't overdo it. It is possible to give it your 100% commitment and have fun at the same time. See the "task" of rescuing your relationship as an exciting challenge than a chore. Things will be easier for you this way. Suggest that you go out and do new things or go on new adventures. In return, appreciate even the small things your partner does for you.
Keeping your sense of humour intact will also go a long way. Do not start listing who's done what in your head. If you feel things are starting to slip again, take it all in good stride. Bickering and nagging will not solve anything. Light teasing and joking can do the trick oftentimes.
Though most couples are able to revive their relationship just by following the above tips religiously, there will be situations that call for the help of a Marriage Counsellor or Coach. If you feel that you need the help of a coach or counsellor, do not hesitate to seek the advice of these relationship experts.

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